L-Jay Maasai opened up about what he’s been going through in the past couple of months that a lot of people, especially his fans didn’t know anything about.
The award-winning Maasai rapper took time to talk about how he has been suffering in silence for the past year, suffering from depression that he says he has all the courage to admit that he’s suffering from without any fear of being called out for admitting the same in public.
L-Jay Maasai who also embraced a new moniker; El Shappa took to social media to open up about a lot that he has lost ever since he stopped getting the gigs that he was so used to getting every other weekend, he also noted that he has lost not one but two relationships that he thought that would morph into a serious relationship maybe leading to marriage but he now understands that God has a plan for him and he’ll be patient to see that plan come to fruition.
The Groove Awards winner said that he lost friends who he thought were his ride-and-die, who he believed would have done anything for him, but he came to understand that they were with him so that they can benefit in a way or two from his success and by finessing him in a way they know how to.
He explained that at one time, he was feeling so demoralized, depressed and so down in life so much so that he contemplated taking his own life because he was suicidal at one point because he lost everything, and nothing was looking good for him on the horizon out there.
Even after all the stuff that he’s gone through, he hasn’t lost hope in life. He reiterated that he has a new insight and perspective of life and wants to use that energy surging through his body to make the best out of life through the guidance of God.
Despite losing almost everything and being a single person for a few months now, he’s a happy man today who isn’t looking for any relationship whatsoever but he’s waiting for God to do His will on his life.
He’s also optimistic about good things coming ahead and he cannot wait to claim the good things coming his way in full abundance. He’s also working on a few projects that he will release when the time is right.
On the matter of leaving the gospel music industry, he categorically stated that he didn’t leave the gospel but only left the industry because the only problem was the industry and not the gospel itself because there’s no way he can leave God for anything in this life since he’s the only one person who knows what God has done in his life.
L-Jay Maasai who said that his social media accounts were hacked and only managed to get his Facebook and Twitter back and not his Instagram account took his time to write a very long tell-all piece about what has been going in his life as a public figure and how even members of his family have been planning and waiting for his downfall.
Here’s his tell-all from the beginning to the end as he opened up on Facebook.
“It is definitely VERY DIFFICULT for me to sit and write this because I do not know of the repercussions it will bring towards myself both in my personal life and as a public figure. However, after taking time off it has been many weeks of thinking and reflecting.
I have really struggled to nurse myself through a long period of DEPRESSION and confusion over my life and career. Yes, depression is real, and I am not going to be afraid to say or talk about it because I’ve almost lost my life. I have had suicidal thoughts and even took it to intoxication to relieve stress and anxiety.
I have lost many that I believed were my true friends mainly because I was no longer in the same status as before, booked for gigs, and at least had float (money) to spend. I lost people that I believed were my true and closest friends. Call it betrayal or their lack of loyalty.
I lost everything including my drive and determination. Nothing made sense to me. I became rebellious even towards my own beloved mother that has seen me through thick and thin.
At this point, I realized that even some specific members of my larger family did not want the best for me and we’re gossiping and demeaning me. many have shown that they were/are happy and actually embrace; perhaps my downfall.
Due to mental instability, I could not even keep up with my relationships and fell out of two (one after the other) that I believed in Soo much. Yes, I lost those that I believed were my life partners. I fell out with artists working with me under my label and even ended up with a shut down of the label, all because I could not even handle myself.
When Corona hit, I found myself house hopping severally, too stressed to stay alone not to mention the landlord’s dues. My vehicle parked for months, where is the fuel?
No upkeep, no peace, there has been nothing but favors from a few Samaritans. I’m the kind of person that doesn’t talk much and that prefers to deal with issues on my own, I never really open up I keep things to myself no matter the situation.
It has been a rough season for me. I cannot even write it all down melted in emotion.
Many have asked why I left the Gospel industry, let me make it clear today that I did NOT leave Gospel, I left the industry but God is still my number one, I will sing and praise His Name every day of my life because I’m the only one who understands where He has brought me from. Through prayer, fasting, and self-realization I have discovered new directions that I did not see before.
When I took a break I lost my Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter accounts. I was hacked I’ve only managed to recover Facebook and Twitter. Instagram? I have not been able to recover. Any help is welcome.
In the midst of all this, I can’t even explain the intensity of the Passion, determination, and burning urge that has come over me. I have a whole new conviction, new energy and spirit to WORK harder than ever before.
For those that know me, L-jay Maasai is not lazy and I believe in God’s favor, He’s anointing and sufficient support this year and the future at large will be a great new chapter and season wholesomely.
Let me Thank Victor (Royal Music), AntiVirus Av, Kevin Mutia, My sister Sandra, my step Dad Edward Freeman, and of course, my mother for always believing in me and keeping me encouraged regardless! and a few friends that always checked on me and gave me hope through the roughest time of my life. Even if I ignored your calls, texts, you still understood me and never gave up on me.
This year my phone will always be open to receive your calls and texts. I have truly known my real friends and family. You’ve believed in me through the toughest times even when I thought I was a nobody. I was reminded of greatness Daily. Thank you!!!
2022 is here… Eric Omondi said that Kenyan artists are asleep and not working hard enough, I coincide with that but more so I’m about to change that!,” he said in his first part of the social media tell-all post.
He went on further to add,
“I can’t stop tearing, I feel so empty, fewer friends, smaller family, I’m surprised, shocked and I just can’t explain what I’m feeling.. I want to pass my appreciation to everyone who has taken time to encourage me. I don’t want to reason bad things anymore. Soo touched by all your comments.
I may not be able to reply to all but I have seen and will try to respond to everyone, for those sending private messages I will answer you now;
Well, Mum is okay, in fact, she just graduated in December, very proud of her, she inspires me every day of my life even when we don’t get along, nothing will ever beat my love for her. As for my relationship, I’m indeed single not searching but waiting on God to bring the right person. Sounds very cliche but it is what it is. I’m choosing to trust the process.
This time I’m not letting anyone or anything bring me to my knees except when I’m praying. I will kneel only before God, His promise is that He will fight all my battles for me, I believe and have faith in that! Forget the Car, the house, I’m even forgetting the “friends”. Real or not I have new enlightenment and vision to see real and fake. Call it intuition or gift, I really don’t know but I have resentment for fake.
What I have been through has taught me Soo much, more than I could ever learn in any school or institution. I’m also stretching my hand to anyone who has or is suffering from mental instability that I have been through, as I said DEPRESSION is real!!! Anxiety and stress is just part of it.
I have read, watched, and studied all the Verses sent to me and I can’t stress enough how encouraged and motivated. I am certain the blessing will come 7th fold.
Many thought I was doing this as some sort of PR or ‘kiki’. It took me long enough to contemplate about speaking out.
The question of whether I’m a Gospel artist or secular I think Is clear. The industry was the problem NOT the GOSPEL. I will say no more on that. I believe God is in control and we shall see soon.
I can’t thank you enough for the support since day 1. I’m much SHAPA.[sic]”
